Everything is a choice…..


“Everything is a choice.

This is life’s greatest truth and its hardest lesson. It is a great truth because it reminds us of our power. Not power over others, but the often untapped power to be ourselves and to live the life we have imagined.
It is a hard lesson, because it causes us to realize we have chosen the life we are living right now. It is perhaps frightening for us to think that we have chosen to live our life exactly as it is today. Frightening because we may not like what we find when we look at our lives today. But it is also liberating, because we can now begin to choose what we will find when we look at our life in the tomorrows that lie unlived before us.
What will you see when you look at your life ten years from now? What will you choose?” 
~ Matthew Kelly from The Rhythm of Life

Failure, the key to success…


“There’s nothing wrong with failing. In fact, failure needs a new name. “Failure” should be renamed “awesome.” Everyone loves awesome… Most folks think of failure as the opposite of success, but I beg to differ.

It’s like what Winston Churchill said: “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” Failure and success are Siamese twins; they don’t exist without each other. There’s no way around it. The problem with the word “failure” is that it connotes that you’re a loser—and losers don’t succeed or win or get the girl (or guy or pie or pot of gold or whatever it is you want to get). As a result, many people would rather play it safe, not take chances, not explore, and never, ever stick their neck out to actually try.” 

~ Tony Horton from The Big Picture

Toward a Psychology of Being


“The serious thing for each person to recognize vividly and poignantly, each for himself, is that every falling away from species-virtue, every crime against one’s own nature, every evil act, every one without exception records itself in our unconscious and makes us despise ourselves. Karen Horney had a good word to describe this unconscious perceiving and remembering; she said it “registers.” If we do something we are ashamed of, it “registers” to our discredit, and if we do something honest or fine or good, it “registers” to our credit. The net results ultimately are either one or the other—either we respect and accept ourselves or we despise ourselves and feel contemptible, worthless, and unlovable.” 

~ Abraham Maslow from Toward a Psychology of Being

Why we do what we do..



“The researchers found that if any of the three extrinsic aspirations—for money, fame, or beauty—was very high for an individual relative to the three intrinsic aspirations, the individual was also more likely to display poorer mental health. For example, having an unusually strong aspiration for material success was associated with narcissism, anxiety, depression, and poorer social functioning as rated by a trained clinical psychologist…

In contrast, strong aspirations for any of the intrinsic goals—meaningful relationships, personal growth, and community contributions—were positively associated with well-being. People who strongly desired to contribute to their community, for example, had more vitality and higher self-esteem. When people organize their behavior in terms of intrinsic strivings (relative to extrinsic strivings) they seem more content—they feel better about who they are and display more evidence of psychological health.”
Edward L. Deci from Why We Do What We Do




“In order to grow, you must constantly look for ways to get better at the things you do. It is an ongoing process that is common to elite performers. They consistently look for ways to grow in areas that will increase the chances of their being successful…

John Wooden, the famous UCLA college basketball coach who has won more games than any other basketball coach in history, said that the thing that separates the great player from the good player is that the great player works on his strengths. The elite performer focuses on strengths and then focuses on his weaknesses. He makes it a point to focus on how he can improve and grow. Elite performers don’t focus on excuses, nor do they focus on winning or losing. The elite performer focuses on progress, and he takes advantage of his opportunities.”

~ Troy Bassham from Attainment




“When you let go of your attachment to the object you desire and make your desire the experience of staying focused on working toward your goal, you are fulfilling your desire in every minute and you are patient with the circumstance. There is no reason not to be. There is no effort or “trying to be patient” here. It is just a natural response to your perspective. This shift in perspective is very small and subtle on the one hand, but it has enormous freeing power. No task seems too large to undertake. Your confidence goes way up as does your patience with yourself. You are always achieving your goal and there are no mistakes or time limits to create stress.”

~ Thomas M. Sterner from The Practicing Mind

The Instructor’s Awareness…



“By now, you should realize, or shall we say be aware of, several themes running throughout this book. One of these themes is awareness itself. You cannot change what you are not aware of, and that truth is no more important than in the world of self-improvement. We need to be more aware of what we are doing, what we are thinking, and what we are intending to accomplish in order to be more in control of what we are experiencing in life. But in fact, for most of us, this is a problem because we are so disconnected from our thoughts. We just have them. The horses are running and we don’t have the reins. We need to be more of an observer of our thoughts and actions, like an instructor watching a student performing a task. The instructor is not judgmental or emotional. The instructor knows just what he or she wants the student to produce. The teacher observes the student’s actions, and when the student does something which is moving in the wrong direction, the instructor gently brings it to the student’s attention and pulls the student back on the proper path. A good instructor does not get emotional in response to the student moving off the path. That kind of negative emotion comes from expectations, and that is not the perspective we want to have if we are to be our own instructor. Expectations are tied to a result or product; once again, we are experiencing the feeling of “things should be this way right now, and until then I won’t be happy.” When you or someone else is experiencing these kinds of emotions, it is an indicator of falling out of the process, or falling out of the present moment.” 
Thomas M. Sterner from The Practicing Mind